When i PMS it's like a blind rage of red over my eyes

Oh hey guess where i am!!!
I bet you'll never even get close to where i am...
work.
surprise surprise!!
I swear if they had a shower here i could live here.
Anyways....class today was as good as it's gonna get....today was my bo-bo music app. class. We are on the romantic period and i swear i know more than my professor. we watched a bit of the Nutcracker ballet...Pyotr Ilyich Tchaikovsky is one of my favorite composers...mainly because he is so incredibly messed up in the head.
I have a 500-word essay due tomorrow comparing two of our assigned poems....and i honestly am just not in the mood to write about anything right now because everything coming out sounds stupid and i'm PMSing like a mo fo and i can't concentrate cause my throat is scratchy and i'm at work and bored and sick of christmas already....
I love feedback...
of any kind...
so let me hear it! :)
---peace&love---

Elephant tranquilizers...

I would kill for about six of them.
I have a killer headache...it's probably due to the fact that i've been crying for the past hour or so...or because i've been watching people get their heads pounded on UFC unleashed...or because i have bad genes and my dad gets bad headaches all the time....dear God there's a lot of blood coming out of that dudes face...:(

I shall conquer you, Womanhood

Ugh nothing like a cocktail of pain killers and surfing through the millions of blogs on this website...i love the random pictures of people...
you get to know them through their smiles and the silent laughs behind them.
Work is scarey at night...
remind me to get a new thing of mace.

Pikashures

"You guys are the ones walking funny..."

What is Polio?


Polio, or more properly poliomyelitis, was one of the most feared and studied diseases of the first half of the 20th Century. Though the Salk and later the Sabin vaccines have essentially eliminated the disease in developed countries, many mysteries regarding polio remain. This is probably due to the fact that as polio epidemics ended in North America and Europe, research on the disease also came to an abrupt halt. Thus, as LaForce (1983) noted, knowledge about the epidemiology and pathology of polio is essentially frozen at a mid-1950s level.

So yeah...that's polio...it affects lots of different people. Not so common now as it was a looong time ago...but...it did affect me...
there is this woman i know that got polio from the vaccine when she was only four months old. It affected her right leg...attacking the nerves and making it unable for use. She was told that she would never walk, never have children, and never be what the doctors considered "normal" WELLLLLL....this woman decided that the doctors were wrong. She got leg braces and learned to walk...yes with a limp...but it's walking. She also got married...three times. :) and now has a huge family...four kids...PLUS....step children and grandchildren.
This woman does anything she wants...her "disability" has never stopped her before. She has an amazing career as a respected banker. She is a child of God and a miracle in her own way.
This unbelievable lady...is Susan Smith...my mom.
Yeah...she's pretty darn cool.

Holly Jolly Explosion

It's not even thanksgiving yet and i'm ready to puke ornaments.
At work we have listened to nothing but christmas music because that's all that "Muzak" sends for us every month. In my sleep i'm dreaming of white christmases and sugar plum fairies and THAT'S NOT SUPPOSED TO HAPPEN YET! >:(
Around these good ol' parts of alabamer the old ladies get together and decide that they want to parade the "nice" homes of the town every year around this time. So it's not even DECEMBER yet and my house is already covered in tinsel and trees lights, ornaments and those little towns that you can buy and set up. So we set all of this up so a bunch of old ladies can walk through and look at it? Seriously? Like...really?
But my goodness this house looks amazing...like something out of a magazine. my mom is a fabulous interior designer and this house is going to look so empty and naked without the decorations. I'll most likely put up pictures of the final project.

Fall brings to life another masterpiece

A whirl wind sweeps me off my feet and i can't stand back up again because the pounding is too much and i have to go to work
Sleep can wait while i have a second to ...just...
Exhale.
And in a funny way i find myself with you tumbling in and out of consciousness because all i have is a song to make me feel
And all it takes is a love to make it hurt
Inhale
The breeze
My TV sighs from the weight of the world that crushes the dams and now my pillow is soaked to the cool side and my face is stuck
The pressure is too much and all i want is a dream to make it worth while
Someone close to me to make me move
Change my mind...
and i cannot believe...i cannot fear i cannot wish enough on that one star whose light is so bright i wear my shades to prevent long term damage from my imagination making this all up
Making up the fact that my bird bones are invincible and i am not alone
Open your eyes and darling your smile... you're the last one of your kind...
Pulsate through my veins what once was there and now it's dark? What happened to that one person? Dear God help me write something worth my efforts
every scream through my finger tips and onto the unforgiving keys that click away and peck at my brain until they are imprinted in the grey matter...y ...t....w....f...a...i....l..o...v...e...y...o...u...
Failure..i hate this. i wish i could look at the floor and type in the darkness like you do...
Do you? Still do that?
Maybe...
Do you still dance when no bone is watching... when your heart turns the other cheek do you laugh and kiss the boy
Not so fast come back come back steal away a smile steal a smile
Not so tough, found out, found out
When your mother leaves do you light it up? The skyline? The strange and unprepared...you swore you saw it coming.
I'm not good...
Can't keep a beat even her heart has a problem keeping up or slowing down...
Here we go...
I'll burn for you now...cause you're mine and you're not allowed to feel nothin...
And you turn out the lights and i can see your smile and the last thing i hear is an "i love you" and i cannot
Breathe